Don't you send me to vm
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
