Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Randomize
