Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
We had sex on a dog bed..
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
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