Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
