Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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