yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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