Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
