Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just found puke in my bra..
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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