Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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