why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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