Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
