Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
