I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
