dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize