Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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