Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
