she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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