did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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