No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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