At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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