considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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