And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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