I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
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