my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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