Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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