I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
So vagazzling was a success
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Randomize
