It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Randomize
