I think I died a long time ago.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
Randomize