trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
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