idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize