No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
