I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
i accidentally sent all my draft messages..how do i do damage control for the multiple "fuck me now" type msgs sent at ten am?
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
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