it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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