I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Randomize
