just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
