I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
