but the lizard people decide everything anyway
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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