Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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