What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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