I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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