You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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