Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Randomize
