So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
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