if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Randomize
