I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
