For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
