I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
My vagina is very pro this idea
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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