he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
