I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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