OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I am naked and annoyed.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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